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For the Curious   
06:00am 29/07/2003
mood: good
Here is the link to the journal entry I have in my book,
The Mary Celeste Take a peek, its entertaining reading and a site that I love.

More then Words...   
07:41pm 26/07/2003
mood: enthralled
Dear Diary,

How can even begin to put words to the emotions running through me right now, Its hard I find it difficult. I have never been a woman to lack words or a thought on something, it was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me, it was an expensive gift, but it wasn't the price that means anything to me, I was touched by what it was, a single red rose is for love, and this one is permenant.

I admire it in the dim light of the room and it sparkles brightly, the meaning behind it is very clearly gotten. I feel tears of happiness sting my eyes. Some times I don't think I deserve such a kind loveing soul, for all the troubles we went through in Germany, it seems things may actually be looking up now.

He calls me his angel, but if there is an angel in this relationship it is him.

Having been in my life since I was small, I can remember growing up with him and all the childish things we had done and other things we shared, even if Stefen didn't approve of us being so ...flirty with each other, Margali seemed to understand it and rarely said anything to us.

Prehaps she knew what I didn't at that young age.

I loved him then and I love him still now, and I always will.

Of course being of Gypsy Blood must look out for Brooms, wouldn't want to accidently jump the broom.

Learning to Fly   
05:18pm 25/07/2003
mood: determined
Amanda stood quietly on the roof of the mansion her long hair flowing around her life a veil as she gazed out over the grounds of the place that was now her home, her lips curved up at the side as she watched the clouds move across the sky.

She'd come up here to test her limits, she had'nt told Kurt that when she fell there hadn't been a net, and that was part of what she and her mother had gottne into an arguement about, no that wasn't something for his pointy ears, he'd feel bad about it likely and blame himself though he couldn't have possiablely have been there to save her.

In her other hand was something quiet laughable, had everyone in the Mansion not know Amanda was indeed a witch. An antique broom, with dark blue ribbons woven among the straws, willow wood used for the handle, she looked to Silverbell, the kitten was pranceing to get going, she loved to fly.

Amanda hadn't flown since that incident either.

Her form shivered at the idea of flying but she tossed golden curls back from her face and tossed the broom into the air, enchanted by her spell it leveled there and she looked to Silverbell, who took an amazeing leap for a little kitten onto the back of the broom.

Amanda lowered her slight and elfin form onto the broom, she was so nervous there was no disguiseing herself in this case. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes murmuring to herself "think happy thoughts.." her blue eyes opened to slits as she settled onto the broom and leaned into it, the broom moved and she held on for dear life, one -step-at-a time.

She went around the House then back to the roof, it was enough to make her heart pound in her chest and make her short of breath the small ride had been enough for the day.
A little too angry for my own good.   
03:01pm 24/07/2003
mood: guilty
Okay so maybe I shouldn't have done it, I do know sympathetic magic, Kurt was part right about the Voodoo, I did learn it but it was a part of my nature magic training, and when I read his entry I was more concerned about the opening to his entry then what he was actually after at the mall, though I am intrigued at the idea of recieveing a gift, back in the circus that was sort of a courtship, small gifts here and there.

I have to remind myself that not everyone is attracted to a fuzzy blue elf, but ...to treat him like that because of how he was dressed, I grew up in a place where people poked fun at there own appearance, where while it might have been demeaning it was still acceptance.

Now I just want to go cuddle him, because weither he admits it or not I know it hurts him, he's always wanted to be accepted. Even after the incident..with Stefan..but I don't wish to speak of that so I am going onto a totally diffrent track of thoughts.

The spell I did, I feel bad for it now, maybe I shouldn't have done it but, it wasn't really bad bad, with this spell it just give a general bad luck, the person who peeked under his hat, was the target, I keep reminding myself that I am suppose to do good sometimes its so hard to do good and be a nice person, I still have fairy blood, that blood burn passionately no matter what emotion it is I feel, and I felt slighted for Kurt, so ...

I will undo the spell after a day, hopefully it hasn't wreaked to much havok in that time.

Guess its true what my mother kept telling me, Vengance runs in my blood, and that a small slight will feel like a slap to the face, but its not me that I get upset about its Kurt.

I just want to love him, protect him.

Besides though I am no longer just a beginner even I am not powerful enough to visit unholy terror on her with out knowing her name and or haveing a piece of her clothes -hair or personal effects, but I can give general bad luck, based on the action. It just won't be overly potent.

I am going to go shopping with Jean I think not sure yet, I need to get out and cool off and a dunk in the pool won't help, not even skinny dipping like I use to do as a little girl. (Say not a word fuzzy elf), would help right now.

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12:49pm 23/07/2003
mood: giddy
I have to many warm emotions bubbleing up inside me to be content to sit still and write, I feel like danceing , like floating on air or maybe just singing, Ja, I know not like me, I am the one who is always quiet who tends to others, I have been thought of as innocent even sweet..that amuses me to no end.

I wonder how many people will get confussed I am the girl with two names, Amanda and Jimaine, and since I figured you'd read this my love, you can call me Jimaine since that is vhat you prefer.

How can I describe the joy of being in his arms again, its like being held and loved...complete is the word but even that doesn't sum the whole of the emotion up.

It was close enough to Heaven for me.

I think my little dolls went over well,I know Rogue is so confussed right now that she needs all the cheering up she can get.

And Kurt deserves his matching pair.

I feel like I am walking on a cloud, though I know there are still things that need to be done here, I have yet to talk to Tessa for one, and I want to see if the goo professor is alright but he's just secured away somewhere...or something.

Maybe what all of us need is a good night out at the movies.

Its worth a thought.
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Bearer of Gifts   
08:52am 22/07/2003
  Amanda sat quietly in her room, a feeling of warmth in her very soul after her meeting,her stray kit of sewing impliments strewn before her on the bed, small bespelled spectecal's perched precautiously on the bridge of her nose as she sewed, it was a small blue form currently but would take shape soon enough, he wanted a little blue elf to go with his witch, she could do that.

Glanceing up she watched Silverbell who had recovered greatly from her earlier ordeal with the pool and the Bamphing fuzzy elf. the little silver and grey kitten was entwined in a ball of yarn and rolling around on the floor only entraping herself more.

A giggle escaped Amanda who didn't pay attention to her sewing and was rewarded for that by pricking her finger. "Ouch" she hissed and her eyes quickly went back to the job at hand, she'd already used midnight velvet to sew a tail onto the doll, now she gazed down at it affectionately, she needed to make more then one maybe two, she had sensed that Rogue was feeling down and figured the best thing to do was go ahead and do something "special" for the poor girl.

Plushy's were easy to make with glasses that kept one from botching up, and the fact she had plenty of time to work.

The newer of the two dolls, looked like plushy Ice, with small turqouise buttons for eyes and a body of silk that resembled the color as best she could muster, It was the best she could come to getting a replica of Ice Man for the girl.

She actually had to look up what she could on him to get the form of the doll. (hope Meg won't mind)

Then she went back to furiously stiching.

That done she had two small hand sized plushys done, it wasn't much, but they were cute she just had to deliever said gifts now.
Starlit Meetings...   
08:16am 22/07/2003
mood: loved
Deepening shadows gather plendor as day is done.
Fingers of night will soon surrender the setting sun.
I count the moments, darling till you're here with me,
Together, at last at twilight time.

~Twilight Time~

Starlit MeetingsCollapse )
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Stealth Kitty   
03:32am 21/07/2003
  The small kitten was sent with a little bell around its neck places that she would surely be caught it was simple enough to teleport the kitten in and teleport the kitten out of Kurt's Room, she hadn't been able to catch hiim and that troubled her.

With Silverbell's help,A small doll of a witch was left on the bed side table, complete with broom and all.holding a singular red rose. And a note on rose scented paper.

Dear One,

Wasn't trying to avoid you I seemed to manage to miss you again, that bothers me I wonder if Del is plotting against me or even my mother has found out I err..disappeared. I had troubles with work,I was training to be a airline stwewardess and had to go into the big city, I hate the big city to many strange sights and this from someone who was in teh circus as well.

I suspect that you already suspect me, isn't that so, well...the whole story will have to wait until later, when I get a chance to see you face to face blue fuzzy, but you are in my thoughts and my prayers as well, I left you this little doll , you might remember it or nein? To keep you company until the real me is able to be with you.

So please don't think ill of me for not catching up to you yet, we will I am sure one way or another.

Always Yours,
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A touch of Magic all his own...   
08:24am 20/07/2003
mood: nostalgic
Dear Diary,
Hmmm did he send the flowers of didn't he, it could have been anyone of the boy's here, but Alex is wrapped up in his own little world, I talked to him yesturday, I have only met him and Gambit of the males here, so I have to assume it was the fuzzy elf because Gambit is the type to leave something I would say of a calling card, and the note Do I remember.. I am begining to wonder if someone knows something about me that I hadn't decided to say yet?

Its all very amuseing to say the least, I haven't been intrigued like this since Germany.

In answer I remember numerous things but I wonder which things it is that I am suppose to remember in praticular...
My heart remembers.
Poor little Silverbell almost got the fur scared off her, apparently she saw who ever delievered the roses, I could ask her since she is my framiliar anyways...but I think I will wait...

The roses are romantic though and make me sentimental and think of other times and places, of a single rose and the trapeeze...

But some memories bring a sort of pleasure/pain.

My thanks for the roses, and they will be a fine accompaniment to my bedside table.

Reminds me of my perfume...but I degress, I have a spellbook to be studying, I should check in with Tessa and see how her first night back went, peek in on my girl Rogue and maybe see how the Cajun is healing up.

Note to the Fuzzy Elf   
11:10am 19/07/2003
mood: bouncy
Hey there hon,

If you get a chance come on out to the Pool we can chat there and I can work on a tan I desperately needed...


We can discuss lunch there and actually talk?

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Touch and Go   
05:12am 19/07/2003
mood: hopeful
So it seems that my dear Rogue is trying to "hook me up" I don't like that term so how about, get me a guy sounds better, or even better a fuzzy blue elf..;)

Very sweet of her, plotting my own doom for me and all, though I say that teasingly. It would be nice after so long.

Anyways, The Professor is on my mind as I type this, and I find myself more and more curious about where he is, if he's well if he's done something to us, or if its all of us looking for a way out either way none of the answers truely appeal to this girl.

I plan to have lunch with Kurt soon, as long as Twinkies are not involoved, I heard that Twinkies last longer then anyother substance in a person's system, even SPAM is better, I don't give either a high rating on the food chain.

Oh and Gambit if your reading this, No Ribs dates...lol those ribs will have to be shared with another girl, thanks for the offer, if you can't forgive me as is, I'll just have to turn you into a frog or something...though I think the idea of a french speaking frog scares me more then Twinkies and Spam...never mind that thought, lets just call it even and leave it at that.

Prehaps I will join you in a danger room session and prove to you that though I worked high wires I can still go err...splat..to put it kindly.

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Rantings of a Witch   
09:00am 18/07/2003
mood: contemplative
Dear Diary,

Why is it when I am at my oddest there is always a light there for me, you know I never did get back to feed Silverbell, that cat's going to have a fit when I DO go to my room. Yeah well who need's a framiliar anyways? Talked to Rogue for a bit, she's so much fun and a real sweety as well, her concerns for Bobby border on the concerns I once held as well for someone.

Speaking of Someone, is it possiable to have a visitiation? I could have sworn I saw...No it couldn't have been but it seems like him, I really can't say much for fear of actually giving myself away here.

The troubles in the Danger Room, disturb me a little bit, but all in all I know that Scott is trying to teach the cajun a lesson, it doesn't make it right, and I feel bad because I am the one who tattled as it vere.

That is neither here nore there hopefully he will be alright, I hate teleporting spells, sometimes they don't quiet work how you want them too, and then...well there's trouble.

I still feel we should help him, bad or no its what the X-Men do usually...lol'

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Sleep Is That You ??   
11:34am 16/07/2003
mood: sleepy
Dear Diary,

After I had breakfeast I went to lay back down, of course I covered everything with shrink wrap, (how do they get so much in a small little box like that?), anyways, Silverbell was waiting for me as always, the kitten's bright golden eyes reflects the dark most oddly, so as I open the door, the kitty's tail goes up and Silverbell peers at me, like I dare disturbed sleep.

That kitten has a personality all it's own, shouldn't it be out of bed ,chaseing its tail...climbing my curtains...Something!!??!!

Nope, purring contently on the foot of my bed.

I casually disconnected my cloack from power, Felix looks odd caught in a moment, with his eyes shifted to teh left, sorry old fellow had to be done.

No alarm's now the only thing that can possiablely disturb is is the sound of the phone or someone at my door.

As I write this my lids are growing heavy and I find that I don't so much mind the fact that my typeing is sporadic and slowing down...everyone needs a hobby.

So since I can't stay awake much longer I will write back later and draw this to a close.

I have so many questions..

What drew me home?


How is everyone else after all this?

I really must check up on my friends when I wake back up...but for now sweet dreams..

Jimaine Szardos
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A Moment In Time   
10:41am 15/07/2003
mood: contemplative
Dear Diary,

It feels odd to be back on soild ground, all the training I have been doing to be a stewerdess has gotten me wondering if this is truely the best job for me, I am a gypsy I am well aware and it queals my urge to roam about easily enough but it doesn't help with the feeling that I would be missing something if I didn't return home, call it serendipity or prehaps just my very own soul telling me this but I need to be Home, its where I belong, nein not Germany though the snowy Alps to call...

But rather home to the Xaiver Institue....

I wasn't aware that it would call to me like this, I am sure that it would be a surprise to all the inhabitants, I know that if anything they will take me in just because I have helped out in the past, its Home a place you always know you can return to.

I look at myself in the mirror and I can tell something is up...I can see it in the mirror when I look at myself, my complexion is natural suppose to be dark and mysterious but, there are shadows under my eyes that even the light of day can't heal...These dreams.

I wonder if they are my own or someone close to me? Could it be Kurt or even Mother...but it doesn't feel like them and I give each person I ever come in contact with a certain aura that I then after identify with them, this is malice pure and simple.

I hope to uncover more about it at the Mansion because surely I am not the only one to be having these dreams.

~Jimaine Szardos...~